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About Me

I was born in 1992, I live in the USA, and I enjoy my privacy despite being chatty as fuck. You can call me Ace. I use they/them and/or he/him pronouns.

I've been a fanfic writer and reader since 2006. Since I like to keep my fandom activity siloed, I decided to make a new account for kpop stuff when I realized it was my new primary fandom and likely would be for some time.

I started listening to kpop in 2009 and stayed on the periphery of the fandom for a long time. I heard the big songs and big news, but I didn't follow any groups closely. In 2015, I started listening more and steadily went deeper and deeper into the fandom. And now here I am writing RPF.

About This Blog

I miss the old days of livejournal style blogging, so I figured I'd try taking it up again even if I was shouting into the void.

I intend to use this space for content that's too long for my twitter and inappropriate for my AO3. At the moment, I'm planning to post "extended author notes" for my fic Maybe the Truth since people have expressed interest in that. I'm also planning fic recs, top song lists, etc. It may not be all kpop related? We'll see! This is basically a for-fun experiment.

Feel free to comment, even if you're a stranger. I like talking to people online and making friends!

Haven't been on Dreamwidth much lately, but I'd like to change that, at least a little. So here's a list of the 10 books I liked most in 2023, except I cheated and combined some book together into one list entry. I read pretty broadly, but you'll notice some trends in what interests me just from this short list.

If you've read any of these, let me know! I'm also happy to take recs, although I notoriously take forever to get to the things people rec me, hahaha. Listed roughly in the order that I read them this year.

The Husky and His White Cat Shizun vol. 1 - 3 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou

Summary: A villain starts life over as his younger self and comes to understand the teacher he hated better.

My interest in this series began due to how heavily people content-warned for it, so I felt almost let down by how 90% of it is actually pretty silly. However, this series got better with each volume I’ve read so far. It lured me in with the extremely fanfic-y tropes it pulled out in volume two, and volume three REALLY sold me on the emotional front. (The wonton scene? If you know, you know.) Overall, this series has a lot of issues, but it’s been a fun ride, and I am absolutely still on board.

Song of the Bull Rider by Alex Singer

Summary: A non-binary youth in a highly binary world becomes a war prize/political hostage and must navigate court politics and a civil war.

A cartoonist I really admire recommended this queer historical fiction indie novel, and it didn’t disappoint. I enjoyed the dynamic between the two leads a lot, the prose was understated but well done, and my biggest quibble at the end was that I wished it was longer. Probably the number one book I am recommending on this list because so few people have heard of it, and that’s a shame.

Annihilation by Jeff Vandermeer

Summary: A biologist explores the mysterious Area X as part of a research expedition.

This was a reread, but the book was just as well-crafted and chilling as I remembered. The atmosphere that the author creates is just incredible. I’ve never read the sequels, but I am aiming to get through them in 2024.

Severance by Ling Ma

Summary: As/after a virus brings the world to a zombified halt, our heroine muddles through a dead-end job, a deserted NYC, and a road trip with perhaps the last people left alive.

One of the most “by a millennial, for millennials” books I’ve ever read, especially millennials who were working crappy office jobs during the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic. (The fact that this book was published before the pandemic gives it an extra eerie and relatable feel.) The narrative structure of this book is absolute goals for me and was actually a big inspiration behind the structure of my fic Speaking Cats.

The Sparrow by Mary Doria Russell

Summary: Aliens are real, the Jesuits send missionaries and scientists to make first contact with them, and it comes terribly.

If you just read the summary for this book, it looks like a paper-thin Christian Fiction premise, and I wouldn’t have picked it up if not for all the enthusiastic reviews I read for it. I’m glad I did because this was some of the best sci-fi I’ve read in a while. Interesting themes, a well-thought out alien world, and an endearing cast of characters that you can’t help but like even though you know they will meet tragic endings from page one. Overall, I get the hype! However, having read a spoiler-y summary of the sequel, I don’t think I will ever read the next part.

Game Changers series by Rachel Reid

Summary: In book one, a NHL players makes the bold move of coming out as gay; in five more books, various other hockey players and their boyfriends explore the new possibilities this creates.

This gay hockey romance series truly got me in a frenzy. I blew through all six books in a week! While I liked some books better than others (Tough Guy was my top pick), the series overall was just extremely my taste when it comes to romance novels. This author and I seem to both appreciate a lot of the same tropes, character dynamics, and issues to explore. While I read romance novels fairly often, I rarely feel the need to re-read them. This is the rare case of a series that I will absolutely come back to.

Flowers of Fire: The Inside Story of South Korea's Feminist Movement and What It Means for Women' s Rights Worldwide by Hawon Jung

Summary: The title says it all.

A well-done and very timely primer on modern feminist movements and issues in South Korea. If you are like me, you will probably think to yourself, “Wait, tell me more about ___!” as it hustles from topic to topic. But it understandably has a lot of ground to cover and is only meant to be an introduction. Hopefully, more works about South Korean feminism will be published in English in the future. But in the meantime, I think this is a real must-read for anyone interested in Korean culture.

The Radiant Emperor duology by Shelley Parker-Chan

Summary: A Han Chinese peasant in Mongol-ruled China escapes death, becomes a monk, and aspires to take over the empire...and it's all very (gender)queer.

She Who Became the Sun and He Who Drowned the World both take the crown for number one most frustrating books I read this year, if only because I wanted to love them 100%, but!!! The potential was huge! Parts of this duology absolutely slayed me! However, I got the impression that the writer was very Baby Trans while working on this series, too early in their journey to be tackling some of the topics in a way that would satisfy me. I’ve been there, I went through my Baby Trans stage too, and I think if the author wrote this series even just five years later, it would’ve been a lot more nuanced and thoughtful in regards to gender and queer identity (and class). That said, I will definitely be re-reading these books, I highly recommend them, and I’m excited for what the writer might write next.

Everything I Never Told You by Celeste Ng

Summary: A Chinese-American family in 1970s Ohio grapples with the death of their eldest daughter and the secrets they've been keeping from each other.

Possibly my favorite novel this year? I had a hard time putting this down, and at the same time I also wanted to go slowly and savor it. The narrative structure, prose, and themes were all very much my taste in terms of what I like to read and what I aim to write.

This Is Not a Book About Benedict Cumberbatch: The Joy of Loving Something--Anything--Like Your Life Depends On It by Tabitha Carvan

Summary: The title says it all.

A quick, humorous, and occasionally heart-wrenching nonfiction read that I highly recommend to everyone who spends a lot of time and energy on fandom. Even if you don’t fan in the same way as the author or like the same things, you will find a lot to relate to. Especially recommended to those who entered fandom as adult women.

Quick Hits

Posted Word Count: 102,840
Unposted WIP Word Count: ~20,000

Fics Completed: 5
Fics in Progress: 1 on AO3, 5 in drafts

Longest Fic Posted: 54,202 (Maybe the Truth)
Shortest Fic Posted: 5,143 (One More Time)

Fandoms: SHINee (2), SuperM (1), NCT/Seventeen (1), Ateez (1), OnlyOneOf (1)
Ships: Minho/Key (2), Taemin/Kai, Xiaojun/Jun (1), gen fic (1), KB/Yoojung

Events: XXL X-over Xtravaganza (2), Summer of SHINee (1), Trans Choi Jongho Tag Flood (1), Yuletide (1)

Favorite Opening Line: If Dejun time traveled and told his 2015 self that in five years he would be riding a taxi through Seoul wearing a Princess Jasmine costume to hook up with a guy, his 2015 self would’ve thought he was insane. (Jasmine, Deflowered)

Favorite Ending Line: He sets himself on fire, and he doesn’t burn. (On Fire)

Year Overview

( Read more... )

Fic by Fic Notes

Maybe the Truth
SHINee, Minho/Key, Minho POV, 54,202 words
One sentence summary: Minho grows up, grows into his idol career, and grows increasingly aware that he might have been lying to himself about some things.

( Read more... )

Remember What You Told Me
SuperM, Taemin/Kai, Kai POV, 6,202 words
One sentence summary: Kai panics when he wakes up after a drunk Vegas marriage to Taemin.

( Read more... )

Jasmine, Deflowered
NCT/Seventeen, Jun/Xiaojun, Xiaojun POV, 7,945 words
One sentence summary: Xiaojun goes over to Jun’s dorm for a hookup…dressed as Princess Jasmine.

( Read more... )

On Fire
SHINee, Minho/Key, Key POV, 11,297 words
One sentence summary: Key struggles with self-esteem and also struggles to realize he’s crushing on alleged straight boy Minho.

( Read more... )

Self Made
Ateez, gen fic, Jongho POV, 18,051+ (WIP)
One sentence summary: Jongho confronts the narrow scope of masculinity he operates in at the same time someone tries to expose his transgender identity to the public.

( Read more... )

One More Time
OnlyOneOf, KB/Yoojung, KB POV, 5143 words
One sentence summary: KB and Yoojung fail to kiss twice, but the third time is the charm.

( Read more... )

Singles

1, 2, 3 Eoi! - Mamamoo

OK, I don't have much to say here. This single is basically Mamamoo just doing what they do. But what Mamamoo does is great, and they do it very well! I feel like you can listen to just this and get a good idea of what their music is like and why they are so acclaimed. I also appreciate that the MV is just casual fun, like we're just getting a peak at these women hanging out. They don't need to flex, and they know it.

Alone - Highlight

The 2nd-gen post-enlistment boy group renaissance has been very fruitful for me, and this MV was such a delightful surprise. It's not the styling or sound I would've expected from Highlight, although admittedly I haven't kept a super close watch on their discography. Anyway, I'm obsessed with the pre-chorus and chorus. The way the instrumentation drops out? Perfect. Also, I love the stompy boots lol.

because - Rie (OnlyOneOf)

KB's "be free" remains my favorite of the undergrOund idOl project / be series, but objectively speaking, I think Rie's "because" is the best song. His voice is really lovely on this track, and it's perfectly suited to his vocal strengths. Also, we love queer media references in queer media. The MV continues the gay cinematic universe storyline, this time taking us in a more angsty direction (fight? break up?) Anyway, the underwater pool shot at the end is art.

Birthday - Ten (NCT)

Sultry, slutty, and not at all straight despite the obligatory singular "girl" in the lyrics lol. Can't believe the iconic hat from this MV came about on the spot (the draping fabric is just a tablecloth they had lying around, iirc.) Ten never disappoints me, he's got so much star power in his little body. SM tends to move slowly on solo album debuts, but I hope he can put out an album in the next three years or so. The choreo video is also highly recommended.

Halazia - Ateez

I waited until the last minute to finalize my lists because a bunch of very anticipated releases (for me, at least) were scheduled for December--including this "spin off" from Ateez. The rest of the album is remixes of old tracks and an instrumental outro, but this single sure does deliver. I don't think an Ateez MV has ever been this cinematic? Everything I've learned about their lore was against my will, so I don't know what's going on, but it sure looks cool as fuck. Lyrically, this seems like it might be calling back to several other tracks, so that's neat and something I'll look more into later. When this song started, I was initially not sold, but holy hell, that last verse? That outro??? Immediately replayed three times.

Hello - Treasure

This sounds, looks, and feels like kpop from the early 2010s, and I love that for it. It makes me so nostalgia...like, damn, I really missed this kind of single!!! Dare I look that we will start seeing more groups go in this direction? Is ten years enough to make this retro and back in fashion? Between this and Jikjin, I really need to start paying more attention to Treasure.

Impurities - Le Sserafim

Antifragile was the title track on this album, but Impurities is my preferred single from this era. The relaxed vibe of this song is so my style, and I feel like it's a song we often hear girl groups promoting (especially freshly debuted ones.) Also, the harp? Yes. The B-sides down below was very fierce competition, so I'm gonna cheat a bit by also recommending No Celestial here.

Mirror - Chanmina

Is Chanmina kpop, technically speaking? Probably not, but I don't care! The song is sooooo good, it takes me straight back to my middle and high school years. The vibes are Avril Lavigne at her best, and Chanmina's voice has the perfect amount of whine to give it a memorable edge. Also, I didn't look up the music video until I started making this, and!!! !) Her looks are immaculate, and 2) the K.will "Please don't..." ending??? Queer people win, always.

Poison Rose - Craxy

It wouldn't be a Q4 list without at least one horror-themed release for Halloween. In terms of spooky concepts, this is my favorite for 2022, and it's also by far the least viewed MV of all four of all my lists. (At time of posting, they haven't even cracked 8,000 views yet.) Give the girls some love because they did a great job. The creepy vibes are in full force in the vocals, performance, music, and styling. This release deserved far more attention, in my opinion.

Young Boy - NINE.i

I am not yet too old for youth anthems, it seems. Thank goodness. Anyway, I love all the synth in this track, and I also love when it drops out, and we just get the guitar for a bit. (Bass? I can barely identify instruments, y'all, have patience with me.) The video is also fun, although I wish they maintained the aged editing from the intro throughout the whole thing.

B-Sides

Anywhere But Home - Seulgi (Red Velvet)

Competition among my B-side picks was a blood bath, probably the fiercest match-up all year. To keep it to just 10 songs, I had to cut so many beloved tracks, including Seulgi's impeccable Dead Man Runnin'. Ultimately, I chose Anywhere But Home as the representative from her first mini-album because it was an instant addition to my driving playlist.

Bounce Back - WayV

Y'all, I waited so long for this comeback, and it didn't disappoint. ;; The title track Phantom wasn't quite strong enough to edge onto my singles list (though it's growing on me, so I might regret that later lol.) But this mini-album is stacked with great B-sides (plus some singles I love that I thought would never get a physical release, like Ten & Yangyang's fun English earworm Low Low from last year.) I think Bounce Back will likely be the fandom's favorite B-side from this release. It's definitely a solid get up and dance track. But my personal favorite will make an appearance down below.

Castle in my Dream - Lee Chanhyuk

This album has an interesting concept (storyline style album about the singer's allegorical death and rebirth), so it's worthwhile to listen to the whole thing in order while reading along with a lyric translation if you can't understand Korean. All the songs go well together, but they are also all very distinct. This track appears around the final act of the album and features a dreamy but upbeat tone and a message about coming to terms with the end of things and dreaming of what to build when you start over.

Good Life - WayV

Here we go, my top favorite from the long-awaited WayV comeback. This song immediately jumped out at me when I first listened to the album, and repeat listens have only solidified it. This track is just pure good vibes and good vocals. These easy listening type songs tend not to be mega popular, but they are always a hit with me.

Just like now - XEED

So, I recommend checking out this entire debut EP because it's solid stuff (other favorites: A boy from future which is vocally spectacular and Stargazing which is fun, fun, fun) but a simple acoustic ballad like Just like now is always is bait for me. All I want is to hear some guys SING, you feel me? This group made a bit of a buzz because they all debut as grown men (oldest is 1992, two 1994, and maknae is 1996.) I always support my 92 buddies, especially the so-called late debuters. (Let's be real, in what world is 30 too late to be pursuing music dreams??? Your life is just getting started at age 30 for fuck's sake.)

Love Burn - Baekho

I'm going to miss NU'EST, but at least we will be seeing individual work from the members, and this debut solo album from Baekho was solid through and through. Love Burn is the clear standout for me though. It's a little sexy and a lot dramatic, just how I like it. Passionate love being compared to fire is an old cliche, but it works well for a reason and this song proves it.

Prove It - Minho (SHINee)

Ahhh, I never had any doubt that Minho would complete the "plagiarism series" of SHINee solo debut albums since he is a supremely sentimental guy, but it still got me a little emotional when he confirmed he was in fact following the tradition that Jonghyun began. The title track Chase wasn't quite my speed (ha), but I love the B-sides (this seems to be a trend among my favorite artists this year.) Prove It miiiiight be my favorite off the EP? It's hard to say, but Minho's vocal color is really suited to a song like this.

Pump Your Sneakers - Younite

Y'all ready for pure serotonin??? This track is super fun, and the boys' bright voices instantly make me smile. Instant addition to my "time to clean, give me energy" playlist. I love the feeling, it's true.

Runaway - Minho (SHINee) ft. Gemini

I'm a sucker for blending traditional instruments on otherwise modern tracks, and this is a great example of it. It was hard to pick between Runaway and Choice to round out my top 10 B-sides, but Runaway took the victory through its cool but laidback vibes.

TASTE - Lee Know, Hyunjin, & Felix (Stray Kids)

Speaking of cool, holy shit??? This track is addictive. It starts out haunting and then everything escalates so quickly. Felix's iconic deep voice is utilized extremely well here too since it's juxtaposed with Lee Know's falsetto and then Hyunjin provides a middle ground to keep the song balanced. Just perfection.

Open call to anyone who wants to play in my kpop themed Music League. (You just need a Spotify account.) The link is here: https://app.musicleague.com/l/59a3071c062345429cc3aed30c69bb23/

How it works is each round has a theme. Submit a song that you think suits the theme. Once the songs are gathered, a playlist will be generated. Award points to the songs you like best and/or think best suits the theme. You can also leave comments! Whoever gathers the most points after all the rounds wins the league.

This league is set up to be pretty casual with just five rounds. You have up to five days to submit a song and up to five days to vote. (Music League will send you reminders.) However, if everyone submits/votes in under the five day deadline, the next part will move along right away. I've kept the league limited to just 10 people, so the playlist won't be super long. It will be quick and fun!

Let me know if you have any questions! And if you know someone who might want to play, feel free to invite them.

I made it!!!! Whew!!! This month has been busy, but 30,000 words is a good combination of ambitious but comfortable.

trans!Ateez: 16249 words this month
Yuletide: 3425 words this month
Ateez Bingo: 3452 words this month
johnmark fest: 2543 words this month
minkey OFD: 4558 words this month
TOTAL: 30227 words this month

I wasn't able to finish a full rough draft of the Yuletide fic, so that will be my priority going into December (along with another fic for a non-kpop gift exchange.) But I was able to make progress on my trans!Ateez WIP and get a solid start on my other projects. Really happy with that!

Brief status updates for each fic:

trans!Ateez: I should be able to publish the third chapter within the week! After that, I might take a break for it to focus on my exchange fics with deadlines in December. I'm kinda stuck on where to take the back half of the story, so some time away might help me fit pieces together and figure out how to get to the ending I want.

Yuletide: Ahhh, this is a tricky one. New fandoms are hard! But I'm roughly two-thirds through, and I'm confident I'll be able to post something I'm content with by the deadline.

Ateez Bingo: Of this set, this body swap fic has been the weirdest and most fun. It's gonna require a lot of revision, but I have plenty of time to work on it. Main challenge is going to be keeping it under 10K. (Please, me...no more than 15K, at least.)

johnmark fest: This is another one that is gonna need a lot of revision, but again, I have plenty of time. It's been tricky to get into the right headspace for this one...I might have to take a month to spend focusing only on it.

minkey OFD: Probably the most challenging fic on my current roster due to the difficulties of writing time travel premises. But I'm enjoying it! I've decided to go with a chaptered approach. Ideally, I'd like to post the first chapter before the year ends, but we'll see...it's depends on how much I'm panicking as the two December deadlines approach.

Anyway, that's the end of my fic writing updates for a while. (Probably.) To anyone else who was writing this month, I hope things went well for you, and you're satisfied!

Ahahahaha...progress was made but not much.

trans!Ateez: 12080 words this month
Yuletide: 2715 words this month
Ateez Bingo: 2827 words this month
johnmark fest: 2014 words this month
minkey OFD: 3969 words this month
TOTAL: 23605 words this month

I've managed to keep adding a lot to the trans!Ateez fic since I know well what I want happening in the third chapter, plus I could reuse bits from an earlier rough draft. And I added a tiny bit to the Yuletide fic. Otherwise, no movement. TT

I'd say this is usually the worst section of the month for me (nearing the end so I'm tired, American Thanksgiving disrupts my rhythm, etc.) so I'm not surprised that I fell farther behind. The good news is that there are still five days left, and I only need another 6395 words to hit my goal. Since I have Saturday, Sunday, and Monday off from work, I'm going to try my best to knock out those remaining words then so I can relax the final two days of the month. And if I don't knock them all out by Monday, I'll still have Tuesday and Wednesday. I can do it! Just gotta go go go for the final countdown.

If you're also doing NaNoWriMo, I hope you are in good shape (or already done!) If you're not where you want to be, I hope you can find the time and energy to get some more words out before the month ends. Something is better than nothing!

Ahhh, the last 10 days approach. I'm not ahead like I wish I was at this point of the month, but I'm managing to stay right on track.

trans!Ateez: 9436 words this month
Yuletide: 2542 words this month
Ateez Bingo: 2827 words this month
johnmark fest: 2014 words this month
minkey OFD: 3969 words this month
TOTAL: 20788 words this month

I managed to post a new chapter of the trans!Ateez fic, which was one of my sub-goals for the month, so that's one thing I can check off. Ideally, I'd like to post another by the end of the month, but we will see.

At this point, I want to try focusing more on the Yuletide fic so that I can have a full rough draft complete by the end of the month. I don't know if I can stop myself from tinkering with the other three projects though lol. Again, we'll see.

Current debate is whether to handle the minkey One Fine (Groundhog) Day as a long oneshot or split it into chapters. And if I split it into chapters, should I wait until the draft is complete to start posting it? Quality wise, it would probably be better to wait until the entire story is done so that I can ensure all the details work perfectly--especially since it's a time loop story. Realistically, I am feedback driven creature, and I am hungry!!! Once again, we'll see.

How is the month already halfway over?

trans!Ateez: 6714 words this month
Yuletide: 2190 words this month
Ateez Bingo: 2452 words this month
johnmark fest: 1635 words this month
minkey OFD: 3137 words this month
TOTAL: 16128 words this month

I've finally pulled ahead after being behind for so long! Whoo! This is mostly thanks to revising the trans!Ateez chapter over the last three days since I count rewriting it as raw word count. But I will take it! Initially, I was really unhappy with the draft for this chapter, but as I've been rewriting it, I've found that it wasn't as bad as I thought. (Still needs a lot of work though lol.)

Besides getting a chapter or two of trans!Ateez completed this month, my other core goal is to complete a rough draft of the Yuletide fic. (Everything else either has a much later deadline or no deadline at all.) The Yuletide fic has been coming along in bits, but I am (generously) halfway through the rough draft? I will try to shift more attention to it in the later half of this month to better my chances of actually reaching the end of this (terrible, terrible) draft.

If you're also doing NaNo or another writing challenge this month, I hope you've reached halfway point feeling good! If you're less than satisfied, there is plenty of time left to get a lot done! Keep chugging along!

In other news, I've been watching the Starship Entertainment x Game Caterers collab, and it's been really fun! I don't know anyone in it particularly well (especially the actors), but it's still really entertaining for me. It's neat to see entertainers from such a range of ages all working together.

Singles

2 Baddies - NCT 127

This song is ridiculous. It is camp. It is cringe. I love it. They rhymed the crying emoticon ㅠㅠ with Blue’s Clues. Yuta is wearing metallic nail caps and totally owned this whole concept. Taeyong slides out with an extremely phallic cane rapping “now you wanna ride these wheels.” kmac asked me who was the third naked muscular guy during one of their music show stages and was aghast when I informed her that was the extremely baby-faced Jungwoo. And that outro? Fun as fuck. What more could I ask from possibly the preeminent meme-able group of our time? Zip zip it z-zip it and close, y’all.

After Like - IVE

Damn, this song is so catchy, and the choreo is super charming. This song really blew up this year, so I’m sure I’m saying nothing new lol. So, I will just add to saying that it’s popular for a reason. But when will they release an actual album? It’s just been singles so far? Anyway, they've been cute on Starship's Game Caterers collab.

Beautiful Monster - STAYC

I had a feeling I would like this just from the title, and it did not disappoint. I looooove the scratchy guitar at the beginning and how the instrumentation slowly becomes more layered. The “monster” parts of the choreo are also really cool. I saw them perform this at KCON, but it was really meant to be seen on camera, I think, which is fine because the MV is really neat.

be free - KB (OnlyOneOf)

KB, my 1992 buddy, this is possibly your best song composition ever. It’s such a groove? And the MV is so gay? The Romeo + Juliet fish tank homage kills me. Bless. Anyway, when this MV dropped, the second in OnlyOneOf’s underground idol project/be series, I was surprised and delighted to see that it was a continuation of the love story from the first MV. Of the be series songs that have released so far, it is easily my favorite.

Drummin' - TO1

I saw these guys at KCON knowing nothing about them, and they totally blew me away with their Drummin’ stage. Fun song, fun choreo, great energy on stage, best performance of the night in my opinion. Also, I think kmac and I were seated next to probably their biggest fan in the whole audience because that girl was hollering, and her excitement was contagious. The MV was the first thing I looked up when I got back to the hotel that night.

Forever 1 - Girls' Generation

I feel like this is less of a song and more of a Moment? Like, all musicality aside, it’s just great to see them together after all these years. But! As a song and MV, it is great too. The chorus is so addicting; how can you not sing and dance along? The MV is really straightforward but lets each member shine, showcasing each doing their different activities and coming together for the choreo shots. It is perfect for the concept and the Moment. God, the 2nd gen nostalgia.

Last Sequence - WJSN

kmac has become obsessed with this group since Queendom, so they are my newest fandom-in-laws. From what I’ve seen of their singles, they are hit or miss for me personally, but this is definitely a hit. The song is gorgeous (and Exy has a great rap verse), and the switch from their usual space-y concepts to something vaguely underwater and very loosely mermaid-y is refreshing. (Although I do love the space concepts too, but these vibes are perfect for a late summer song.)

Pose - Kino (Pentagon)

This wins for most sensual male solo MV thus far in 2022 in my opinion. Simple but sexy and deserves way more attention than what it’s received so far. Airy but lush vocals, gorgeous choreography, Kino’s outfit with the belty-corset thing and asymmetrical boots??? This one is for the girls and the gays.

Somebody - Hwasa (Mamamoo) & Loco

A gift from the Spotify algorithm. I’d never seen the MV until I looked it up for this list. I loved “Don’t” by this collaboration too, so it is perhaps inevitable that I would also love Somebody. Hwasa’s voice is very well-suited to this kind of song, dreamy but full-bodied for a grounded but romantic appeal. Loco doesn’t especially stand out here, but that’s probably the point since he does complement her perfectly in the track.

Whisper - The Boyz

This MV concept could easily been done by a girl group with zero changes, and I love that for The Boyz. It’s cute, it’s fluffy, it’s pink! And yet, somehow, it doesn’t seem too cheesy. It’s actually pretty sexy in parts? The song itself is really catchy and fun, my favorite of what I’ve heard from them. (They are another fandom-in-law group from kmac lol.)

B-Sides

Bound - Key

The competition for singles this quarter was fierce, otherwise Gasoline would’ve appeared in the above list for its outfits alone. Bound is my favorite track off the album, and it’s the one of the three that I think best epitomizes the album’s concept. It’s creepy, it’s sexy, I’m so glad Key promoted it on music shows because I love the head rolling part of the choreo.

Burn - Key

This song concludes the horror-vibes B-side trilogy at the front of the album (Bound, Villain, Burn), and it’s such a strong track to end that section on. Musically and lyrically this song is really straightforward, but Key delivers it in a haunting way that’s chef’s kiss for me.

Circles - Seventeen

The lyrics paint a really simple but potent image. Since looking them up, I’ve been thinking about the aimless wandering of my depression and how it does indeed feel like I'm circling a clock. Eventually, I’ll be okay. It will come around again, but it will also pass again. It’s a sad but pretty and ultimately really hopeful song. Music that can touch me like this song is what I value most.

Cyberpunk - Ateez

Guerilla was good, but THIS should’ve been the title track, if you ask me. Holy hell, the blood-pumping adrenaline of this track. Just listen to it. Everyone’s vocals??? That back-and-forth rap exchange in the second half??? The lyrics????? No song on this album goes harder than this one, and that is really saying something.

Designer - NCT 127

I already liked this song when I first listened to the album, but the guys really sold me on it when they performed it for Dingo’s Killing Voice. (Holy shit, their Killing Voice is so good??? I’ve easily watched it 30 times??? Help me???) It’s sweet in a way that borders on cheesy but never quite goes there, and it also features one of my favorite Johnny verses of all time.

Mirror Mirror - P1Harmony

I am addicted to the HEY MIRROR MIRROR in the chorus. I enjoy the rest of this track greatly, but that little bit has been on constant repeat in my head ever since I first heard this song during KCON homework. Strong contender for top 10 B-Sides for the entire year in my books.

New World - Ateez

The storytelling element of this album is pretty strong, so I assumed that the energy would wind down for the conclusion of the album. Ha, no. New World isn’t as breakneck as the earlier tracks, but it feels more like an epic mid-series climax than a resolution, which makes me very eager to hear the next EP in this series. Also, Mingi’s rap verse in the back half??? Hello??? Anyway, it’s a stiff competition, but this might be my favorite B-side from the album.

The Ring - Ateez

You know what the kpop world needs? More Lord of the Rings references. OK, not really, but I appreciated it immensely. Big thanks also to ateezjpeg for the Ateez/LOTR fanvid.

Villain - Key ft. Jeno

Loving villains is queer culture (according to me), and I do indeed love this song. I like that when other artists feature on Key’s song they feature pretty heavily; his stages with Jeno were a lot of fun. Plus, his voices pairs well with Jeno’s since they have complementary vocal tones. It’s probably unlikely, but I hope they collab again.

WDIG (Where Do I Go) - Ateez

Just casually including most of the album here. Really, really like the production on this track. I want to crunch it between my teeth, if that makes any sense at all.

We're 10 days in! One third through! AHHHHH

I'm still finishing up work before I go on a mini vacation, so I'll (try to) keep this check-in brief.

trans!Ateez: 1935 words this month
Yuletide: 1818 words this month
Ateez Bingo: 1889 words this month
johnmark fest: 1310 words this month
minkey OFD: 2683 words this month
TOTAL: 9635 words this month

I'm still a little bit behind, but I'm not stressing over it. I'm taking Friday, Monday, and Tuesday off from work for a five-day weekend, and I'm hoping to push and get away of my word count finally.

Tiny progress report: trans!Ateez has been surprisingly difficult, but maybe it's just the slump talking. Determined to at least get the second chapter posted by the end of the month. Yuletide has turned out to be easier than anticipated despite being a new fandom??? Maybe because thematically it's familiar ground for me, even if the characters are new? For Ateez bingo, I continue to have no idea where I'm going with it but it's fun. johnmark fest has come up against a wall as I figured I would, but the scene I just finished was so much fun for me that I don't care. And finally, minkey OFD...I have no business pouring as much words into this as I have been since it is the one fic that has zero deadline, but I've been enjoying myself too much. Oh well.

In other news, I finished Seventeen in the SOOP! It was a delight! Gonna be thinking about it for the next half year probably. And I watched the new Johnny's Communication Center today. They made surfing look like so much fun, even though I have negative interest in doing it myself.

The first five days have passed, and I am behind already! :o But only slightly! I'm not worried.

I'm really glad that I decided to aim for 30K instead of 50K because I truly don't have much energy. Usually, at this stage of NaNo, I'm excited and eager. I sit down to write first thing in the morning to knock out a bunch of words and then knock out the rest at night.

But what's been happening is that I get NO writing done in the morning and do my best to meet my word goals in the evening, staying up late. :/ The last few months at work have been busier than usual, so I think it's partly due to that. Hopefully, I will gather more energy as the month goes on. I scheduled a bunch of PTO to help revitalize me--and ideally, get a lot of writing done on those days off too.

Anyway, this is the current status of everything:

trans!Ateez: 982 words this month
Yuletide: 496 words this month
Ateez Bingo: 1555 words this month
johnmark fest: 868 words this month
minkey OFD: 905 words this month
TOTAL: 4806 words this month

None of the fics are giving me too much trouble, although the Yuletide one has definitely been the slowest so far. I expected that though since it's the newest fandom for me. I fully expect to hit a wall soon on the johnmark one and the minkey one since I'm running out of pre-planned scenes. I'll probably go for a drive tomorrow and see if I can have some creative breakthroughs on where to take those fics before I come up against that wall.

To anyone else who is doing NaNo, I hope things are starting off well for you!

In other news, I've been watching Seventeen in the SOOP and having a very relaxing time with it. I wanna go with some friends to a cabin in the woods and write...

I'm not going for a traditional NaNoWriMo this year. Instead, I'm aiming to write at least 30,000 words across five different projects. The lower word count is because I don't want to push too hard, and the five different projects is because I am committed to too many different fic fests and personal WIPs and want to try making at least a little progress on everything.

Since most of them won't be shared any time soon, I figured I'd give a little sneak peak here to satisfy my urge to talk about them.

1) The trans!Ateez fic (Ateez)

OK, it's mostly a transgender Jongho fic, but that's what I've been calling it in my head for ages. This is the only project that's currently accessible since I posted chapter 1 last month. My goal is to write a realistic-as-I-can-make-it kpop trans man fic because I'm always hunting for trans canonverse kpop fic and disappointed by how little I find. I decided to do Jongho for it because of talks I've had with my friend kmac about how his fashion style is very Straight Trans Man. Since I'm not interested in writing a coming out narrative, the fic mostly concerns Jongho working towards a healthier sense of masculinity instead of staying boxed into the narrow scope of masculinity he thought he had to adhere to in order to "pass" as male. And meanwhile, other plot stuff happens lol. Working out what masculinity means to you as a trans masc person is a topic that's near and dear to my heart, so I'm eager to explore it in this fic.

2) One Fine (Groundhog) Day (SHINee)

Working title. I've been wanting to work on another minkey fic, and I was drawn to setting one during the filming of SHINee's One Fine Day back in 2012 since I never touched on it in my long canonverse minkey fic. But I didn't know WHAT to write... until I recalled how much I enjoy time loop or "Groundhog Day" fics. Thus, One Fine (Groundhog) Day was born. This fic is very much in the rough draft stages, and I'm not entirely sure where it's going yet, but I'm having fun.

3) johnmark fest fic (NCT)

This is something I've claimed a fest prompt for and I THINK I'm supposed to stay anonymous? So I won't say much. But! Johnny is one of my favorite NCT guys, and it's hard to like Johnny without also liking Mark lol. This fic is going to be "canon divergent" and (hopefully) smutty... and that's all I'll say for now. I wasn't even going to claim anything for this fest, but the prompt wouldn't leave my head after I saw it.

4) seongjoong body swap fic (Ateez)

I'm writing this for an Ateez fic bingo thing. I'll need to incorporate everything in the row to get a proper "bingo," but the key element in that row (to me) is body swap. It's still early stages for this fic, but I'm planning something canon divergent in which Seonghwa is an idol and has a little crush on the clerk who works at the convenience store near the dorm aka Hongjoong. And then body swap shenanigans??? We'll see where this goes lol.

5) Secret Yuletide Treat (secret)

I'm not actually signed up for Yuletide because I couldn't fully commit to writing anything. But I did see that a kpop group I'm interested in was among the fandom nominees... and someone posted a public letter requesting that group with a prompt that interested me... so I'm gonna try my best to write a little something in time for Yuletide posting as a "treat" fic. All I'll say is that it is canonverse and sorta about "missed connections" in the sense of how rare it is to like someone who also likes you at the same time, when you really think about it. There's a happy ending though!

Singles

Begin - Yoojung (OnlyOneOf)

If I could only name one thing about kpop that excited me this year, it would be OnlyOneOf's undergrOund idOl project (or the "be" series, which they appear to be calling it on YouTube.) From the initial announcement, it was already intriguing--rather than a regular comeback, each member of their group would release a solo project every month. I wasn't sure what to expect, but the first release "Begin" was a thrill. Even in 2022, it's rare to see something as outright queer in kpop as this MV, but OnlyOneOf has been pushing the limits on that for some time. Little did I know that the rest of these solo releases would only double-down on the queerness.

Blow - Jackson Wang

I was anticipating this from when I first saw the teaser, and it did not disappoint. One of the best English-language releases to come out of the kpop world in some time, especially recommended for sexy song lovers. Clever lyrics, sensual delivery, a hot guy in a corset…what more do you need?

Candy Sugar Pop - Astro

Nothing I like better than good old-fashioned singing and dancing with an emphasis on the singing. A strong contender for Song the Summer 2022 at least in my household. From a younger boy group, this track and concept might've been a little too sugar-y sweet for my tastes, but Astro approached with it with a more mature take that I appreciate.

Fearless - Le Sserafim

A really solid debut overall. I checked this out after watching the Hybe Game Caterers episodes because the short bob hair girl charmed me so much there. Like Zoom down below, it’s also made an important contribution to “English kpop lyrics I sing to my cats.” What you lookin’ at, what you what you lookin’ at?

Flip That - Loona

Another track found during my KCON homework. Something about the chorus is simultaneously underwhelming and addictive in a way I can't pin down. I like the airy and unreal feel of the song and MV concept a lot.

Ghost - Taeyong

I look forward to the day when Taeyong releases a full solo album because all the music he’s been dropping independently has been great. I dearly wish this track was on Spotify, but at least I have an excuse to watch the performance over and over. It’s a low budget affair, but Taeyong carries it well with his ridiculous level of charisma.

Good Boys Gone Bad - TXT

More kpop guys should be getting filmed in trash heaps and open graves, I feel. I don’t properly follow the tall boys, but I always check out their comebacks because it’s always worthwhile. While this is far from my favorite release of theirs, who can resist the appeal of some bad boys? It’s a classic for a reason! Great use of whispering on the chorus too.

Hot - Seventeen

I’m usually perfectly happy to just listen to a song, but occasionally there comes a track that I MUST watch along with its music video. This is one such track. So much is crammed into these three minutes…some highlights for me: basically all of The8’s parts but ESPECIALLY what he serves up for the second chorus, Woozi’s stompy bit at the beginning, Dino’s arms at the end, Jeonghan’s steampunk fallen angel concept and the particular way he does the belt-grabbing hip dance in the chorus, Hoshi’s wiggly little “I can’t breathe” center dance, that one glimpse of Jun with the skeleton, Wonwoo stomping his glasses because he has the Sharingan now… another strong contender for Song of the Summer 2022.

Love Theory - Taeyong & Wonstein

I was obsessed with this from the moment it dropped, and I remain obsessed with it. Never have I felt more cursed by the fact that SM Station releases rarely (never?) make it onto albums because I NEED to have an album for this song and its entire visual concept. The silly English lyrics. Taeyong’s little fairy dance. The Lisa Frank maximalism of it all. The sun lady in a knit sweater. Wonstein’s hat with holes outfit. The fact that COVID-19 exists in this music video’s universe??? Incredible, all of it. SM, if you’re listening, you can slap this one song onto a CD and sell it for $25, and I will buy it.

Zoom - Jessi

It’s been a long road for Jessi, so I’m really glad that she’s remained committed to her personal style. I know she left her label recently, so I'm wishing the best for her career going forward. Her delivery on this track is so catchy. The line “I see you looking at my P-I-C” alone has gone triple platinum in my household in my household because I’m always using it on my cats when they watch me eat lol.

B-Sides

Badster - Hyo

By all rights, this shouldn't be here because it is actually a single and it came out three years ago. But! It was included on Hyo's first mini-album this year, so I'm counting it. It's my list! I do what I want! Anyway, if this doesn't get your blood pumping, you should probably see a doctor.

In the Whale - Onew

Dice the song didn't especially appeal to me (besides the Sailor Moon vibes), but as you're about to see Dice the album is my true love. This song is so gentle, and it feels like a bridge between Onew's usual ballads and the synthy music that's all over this album.

Love Phobia - Onew

This song is so simple, but it makes such a wonderful canvas for Onew's gorgeous voice.

On the Way - Onew

Immediately got added to my driving playlist. This song feels like it would've fit right in with the other B-sides on Carly Rae Jepsen's Emotion album--and since that is easily one of my favorite album ever, it's very high praise from me.

Pose - Loona

More KCON homework. Good use of the sample. Good use of chanting. Good use of camera sound effects. Possibly my favorite song that I've heard from Loona thus far?

Punk Right Now - Hyo & 3LAU

Again, this shouldn't be here since it is also a single from three years ago. But it was on the mini album from this year! Blame SM for not giving her a proper album release until 2022. This song is sooooooo cool and addictive. The contrast between her voice and the electronic instrumentation? Delicious.

Second - Hyo ft. BIBI

Another actually-a-single but this time from a year ago. Her mini-album was basically all her old singles plus a new one, I guess. But I'm not just glad they got released so I can own them. I especially love her voice on this track.

Shadow - Seventeen

There are plenty of strong B-sides on the Face the Sun album, but this is the stand-out for me. It's just so my taste? And a good showcase of their vocals.

Sunshine - Onew

Another good fit for Carly Rae Jepsen's Emotion album lol. As you'd expect from the title, this is a bright, fun song that errs away from being too cheesy.

Yeowoobi - Onew

My favorite track off of the Dice album, which is really saying a lot since basically the entire album except the title track is on here. It's simultaneously really heavy and really light in my ears, and I love the contrast.

Singles

1, 2, 3 – AB6IX

I know basically nothing about this group beside the fact that there is not currently (nor has there ever been?) six members. I appreciate the commitment to continuing kpop’s fine tradition of Fewer Members Than You’d Expect. Anyway, my friend kmac sent this song to me, and I immediately loved it. It’s cute, the music video is cute, it's good old-fashioned singing and dancing.

Can’t Control Myself – Taeyeon

I know INVU was her bigger release, and it’s good too, but this kind of emotional ballad is bait for me. I love the drama of the MV too.

Devil – Max Changmin

From the very beginning vocalizations to the final chorus, this is top-notch vaguely sacrilegious vibes, and I am here for the cinematic drama of it all. Devil bless you, Changmin.

Do It Like This – P1Harmony

I actually entirely missed this song when it first came out, but when I saw them perform it for KCON, it hooked me. The hand-punching chorus choreo is very satisfying.

Ghost Town – Moonbin & Sanha (Astro)

This was a gift from the Spotify algorithm, and I am very grateful for it because this song is soooo my type. The sound, the theme, the vocal performance, all of it. I’d actually never seen the MV until I looked it up for this list, and it’s exactly what I’d expect: nothing but a small budget, moody lighting, and a vision.

GingaMingaYo (the strange world) – Billie

Not my usual sound, but my friend kmac trapped me in the car and made me listen to the album immediately after she bought it. The pre-chorus chant has been stuck in my head ever since.

Maniac – Max Changmin

If you haven’t watched this MV, you’ve been missing out on one of the year's most fun MVs in my opinion. And the song! The frantic but well-controlled energy of it is perfect; Changmin is truly at the top of his game here.

suit dance – OnlyOneOf

I am not immune to pretty men dancing in suits. It is a oft-repeated concept for a reason. But OnlyOneOf brings their signature sensuality and unusual sound to the classic concept to turn out something that feels fresh.

Too Bad – WEi

Another case of “I don’t know this group; my friend kmac sent it to me.” Such a fun song, perfect for when you need a pick-me-up.

Weekend – Taeyeon

Addicted to this… I made my coworkers listen to it. An anthem for working adults. When the weekend comes, you really can do whatever you want, so true, Taeyeon. I know this actually came out last year, but I'm counting it for this year because it came out on her album this year. And also this is my list, and I can do whatever I want.

B-Sides

Airplane Mode – Max Changmin

My bread and butter is chill, pretty songs that I can put on and listen to while I write. This song is very chill and very pretty, and thus it is inevitable that I would love it.

Alien – Max Changmin

This song is such a funky groove; it sounds like something that would play at a resort in space. Love the contrast between Changmin’s low and high tones here too.

Better Than Gold – NCT Dream

Lately, I’ve been playing this at the start of the work week to put me in a better mood. Frankly, there is no higher calling for a song.

Dirty Dancing – Max Changmin

Observant readers will notice that basically the entire Devil mini album made it onto this list. I will not repent; it’s a damn good album. The instrumentation in this song got me right away.

Rewind – NCT Dream

Chenle, Haechan, and Renjun sound so good on this track. Everyone sounds good but especially them.

Same Same – STAYC

Found this one while doing my KCON homework. The “oh woah” in the chorus immediately got caught in my ears and hasn’t left yet.

Saturday Drip – NCT Dream

This song has taken over my brain. I no longer have thoughts. There is only “drip drip drip like Jackson Pollock.” I sincerely fear it will be my top-played track on Spotify by the end of the year.

Siren – Taeyeon

This is one of those songs that just scratches an itch in my head. Plus, her voice is especially lovely on this track, I feel.

You Better Not – Taeyeon

I love the pre-chorus and chorus sooooo much, it’s so fun. Great for long-distance drive sing-alongs.

Young Luv – STAYC

I understand why they picked Run2U as the lead single because it’s definitely the more “public friendly” track, but I think this song could’ve absolutely crushed it as a more unexpected choice.